January 2011
30 posts
Who’d win an adorable-off between Zooey Deschanel and the girl from Pomplamoose?
December 2010
64 posts
There’s a sideline reporter at a women’s basketball game named Jimmy Dykes. Now that’s just silly.
I placed a video call to my daughter from my iPhone to the iPod touch I got her for Christmas. The future freaking rules sometimes.
If you can satisfactorily explain why people choose to make their cars extra-ultra-mega loud, I’ll PayPal you a dollar.
I really hate that Hyundai ad that shamelessly courts the hipster segment of the market. Beards! Adorable bangs! Plaid! Scarves! Cars!
RT @mathowie: British people reciting great poems by heart is impressive until I realize I’ve memorized thousands of lines of 80s rap & …
LOOK MAN, I DON’T CARE IF IT’S COLD OUTSIDE. THE LADY SAID SHE REALLY MUST GO.
My friend Sally has an original, signed piece by Howard Finster. This makes me happy. http://twitpic.com/3h4nxj http://twitpic.com/3h4ny7
The daytime hooker from “My Name is Earl” chainsaws a corpse’s hands off. just one of the many reasons you should watch “Winter’s Bone.”
Guess what I’m doing tonight that you’re not? No, not that. Gross. I’m seeing the new “True Grit”! Quite excited.
Delilah is getting preachy tonight. Just make with the smooth tunes, lady.
According to my math, Mr. Potter offered George Bailey today’s equivalent of $700,000 to work for him. I would have taken it.
I haven’t heard much this year about the War on Christmas. Has a truce been declared? Surely Glenn Beck or your mom have thoughts…
A man a plan a canal Suez
Dear guy on European scooter: stop signs apply to you as well. Also, nice scarf.
I’m in a rotten mood today. If I’ve punched you in the throat, now you know why. Bygones?
The rare double gnu. http://twitpic.com/3ee7q8
I love that one of the best Christmas songs features the lyrics “you scumbag, you maggot…”
Oh, you know, just making the Yuletide gay.
RT @drafthouse: Next week! A CHRISTMAS STORY with CHRISTMAS MINI-FEAST! http://bit.ly/hairWn // Who’s going?
RT @preschoolgems: “I fell because I high-fived so hard.”
aaron sorkin hands sarah palin her ass. →
stfuteabaggers:
“Unless you’ve never worn leather shoes, sat upon a leather chair or eaten meat, save your condemnation.”
You’re right, Sarah, we’ll all just go fuck ourselves now.
The snotty quote was posted by Sarah Palin on (like all the great frontier women who’ve come before her) her Facebook page to respond to the criticism she knew and hoped would be coming after she hunted, killed...
Radio ad: “Now when my daughter looks like she might cry, it will be because of something someone said, and NOT cedar allergies.” Jeez!
RT @preschoolgems: “I’m making a unicorn pony princess cat princess land.”
Austin: If your effete, entitled and possibly socialist co-worker is late today, it’s because @kut is currently broadcasting silence.
RT @iamnotdiddy: My horse died. I was gonna write a joke about it, but there’s nothing funny about a horse dying while having sex with a …
Christmas spin. @ Zilker Park Christmas Tree http://instagr.am/p/fh5f/
I say it every year: that acoustic guitar breakdown in the middle of “Holly Jolly Christmas” is badass. Burl Ives…the white Jimi Hendrix.
RT @danhhoang: Nobody likes to eat the bagel chips in your chex mix!